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Uncivil Unions

by Open-Publishing - Friday 10 December 2004
4 comments

Edito Discriminations-Minorit. USA Wayne Besen


by Wayne Besen

To say civil unions are analogous to marriage is like saying a date with Andy
Rooney is the same as a date with Tom Cruise. Yet, many people, even in the gay
community, erroneously believe that civil unions are simply marriage by another
name. Civil unions are not a synonym for marriage, but second-class citizenship
by another name.

On substance, civil unions leave same-sex couples lacking the same federal rights
and benefits married couples enjoy. Without marriage, same sex families are not
eligible for 1,138 federal benefits including Social Security, Medicaid, Medicare,
tax relief and immigration rights. With civil unions, you aren’t even covered
under federal law to take off work to care for a sick domestic partner. When
it is time to display family values, the law does not fully value your family
unless you are married.

Civil unions also lack portability from state-to-state. In the global economy, it is cruel and unrealistic for families to have their legal status dissolved simply because they cross state lines. Imagine having to choose between keeping your family “legal” and providing for them by accepting a higher paying job in another state.

The big losers in this absurd game of relationship roulette are kids. The 2000 census showed 594,000 same sex couples, in which 28 percent had children. If a civil union family leaves the state in which they are protected, their children are left vulnerable and in legal limbo. How do you tell a 10 year old that his non-biological mother can’t see him in the hospital because the state in which he is injured wants to punish his parents by not recognizing their civil union?

I can understand that people are rattled after eleven Constitutional Amendments banning marriage passed on Election Day (and in eight states civil unions too). Reasonable people are looking for a middle ground and civil unions seem like an attractive option.

Indeed, a May 2004 USA Today/CNN/Gallup poll showed that 49 percent of Americans thought, “Homosexual couples should be allowed to form civil unions” while only 48 percent opposed them.

Exit polls showed that while 25 percent of voters favored marriage inclusion for same sex couples, 35 percent were in favor of civil unions. More than half of those who are for civil unions voted for Bush. This means that a mere 37 percent of people are anti-gay values voters. Or is it vicious voters?

The reason, however, that civil unions poll so well is because activists have fought for the freedom to marry. By advocating for full marriage equality, civil unions have become the fallback position. But the moment the freedom to marry is abandoned, Neo-Puritan groups will launch equally devastating assaults on civil unions, thus bringing the poll numbers down.

“We think marriage should be protected, not just in language but in full effect,” Shannon Royce, executive director of the Marriage Amendment Project told the Christian Science Monitor.

“A civil union is same-sex marriage under a different name,” said Michael Heath, executive director of the Maine Civic League.

“Civil Unions are a Trojan horse for gay marriage,” Bob Knight, director of the Culture and Family Institute wrote in USA Today. They are “counterfeit marriage.”

It is crystal clear that anti-gay activists will ensure that the public sees marriage and civil unions as virtually the same thing. It is naïve to think that they don’t have the money and organization to blur the line. Therefore, it is a wiser strategy to defend marriage rather than what fundamentalists will dub “counterfeit marriage.

Finally, it is important that we don’t lose sight of the purpose of the gay movement. It is not simply to win a narrow, if incomplete, package of benefits. It is to erase all barriers that stigmatize and dehumanize, while ensuring that gay people are treated as equals in every way.

Civil unions woefully fail this crucial moral test by creating an ugly caste system where same-sex families are labeled inferior by law. This “separate but equal” second-class citizenship demeans our love and sends a terrible message to young gay men and lesbians. Civil unions do not solve our problems - they simply make it a little easier to defer the hard work we must do until the next generation.

That said, gay people are a small minority and can’t afford to be obstinate and reject civil unions as a last resort. Our families need protections today, and idealism won’t get them hospital visitation rights. However, fair-minded people should always push forward and be wed to the idea that America should never settle for a system that doles out different rights to different people simply for who they are.

On one point I’ll agree with Neo-Puritans. Civil Unions are indeed “counterfeit marriage.”

http://www.outletradio.com/besen/archives/001356.php

Forum posts

  • Wayne,

    You can’t have it both ways. Where the movement began by forcing public acceptance that your behavior is "normal" when it clearly isn’t and the whole of "gay pride" is freedom to live an "alternative lifestyle", the community has to either be content with being proud to be gay and deal with being different, or face continued persecution for insisting same-sex couples be granted marital rights equal to that of heterosexuals.

    When such institutions as marriage were considered by the "community" to be for the "straights" or "breeders", the purpose of pushing for the legalization of gay mariage seeks to destroy a societal norm and rip the fabric of civilization, because the community is still persecuted for their behavior as it always had been. Homosexuality is tolerated in these times, but isn’t accepted and won’t be, as long as there are a majority of Americans that see the "community’s" agenda for what it is. Destruction of moral absolutes, resulting in chaos and Socialism to take its place, is enevitable if the gay marriage precedent is set.

    • Gay hatred will continue to exist and you will continue to be punished by the self righous, pious, better than thou, Christians until you take their Bibles and shove them up their disgusting porn saturated asses.

    • Dream on, nutsack. Painting Xtians with such a broad brush as you do proves your opinion is worthless. Let’s not forget the gay "community" is a vast minority and their agenda will not succeed.

      Expel your flatulence elsewhere. Your perdition will be spent receiving Satan’s penis in your alimentary canal for all etenity.

    • QUOTE:
      "Dream on, nutsack. Painting Xtians with such a broad brush as you do proves your opinion is worthless. Let’s not forget the gay "community" is a vast minority and their agenda will not succeed."

      COMMENT: Exactly what is the gay ’agenda’ you rail against? It sounds to me like you don’t know and you really don’t care anything about gay agenda. You’re the destructive little bully who needs to attack others—for no compelling reason—because you so desire to hate something outside of yourself. Very sad, and very like George W. Bush.