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Leave The Whining To Us

by Open-Publishing - Sunday 13 November 2005

Health Governments USA Wayne Besen

by Wayne Besen

Remember the good old days when liberals were the victims? Today, one has to wear a raincoat not to get splashed by the cascade of crocodile tears cried by whiney conservatives plaintively screaming how they have been wronged. Has there ever been a wimpier group in the history of politics?

This week, a dozen AIDS activists reportedly wearing body condoms were arrested after storming the Family Research Council’s Washington headquarters to protest the group’s deadly anti-condom policies. The small group of rabble-rousers chained themselves to furniture in the lobby.

Understandably, FRC staffers were upset, but the hysterical response by Tony Perkins, the group’s president, was over the top.

"Hateful! Ignorant! That’s how these radicals characterized my statements [about condoms]," Perkins carped. "This is not debate. This is not democracy. What we see is the attempt by a radical few to intimidate, to shout down, to forcibly prevent the expression of any ideas they disagree with."

Waaa. Waaa. Waaa. Would someone get Perkins his little pink blanket?

A few activists engaged in non-violent protest and Perkins acts like it’s the end of democracy. I checked Google and FRC has nearly a million hits. His group is on speed dial to the White House. Perkins doesn’t seem to be having any difficulty expressing himself or getting his, yes, hateful and ignorant message out.

This summer, I was keynote speaker at South Carolina Pride. As I rode atop a float, I was forced to listen to fundamentalists hurling insults and Bible verses at me. These demonstrators were every bit as intrusive and obnoxious as the protesters that confronted Perkins.

But, of course, I didn’t send out a sniveling press release griping about the end of democracy and radicals subverting my message. I simply waved to the yahoos and thanked them for coming to Pride. But then again, I’m not a whiney conservative.

The new conservative wimp factor extends to congressional leaders. Earlier this month, Democrats forced the Republican-controlled Senate into a closed session to force the GOP to stop stonewalling on a key intelligence report. Senate Majority Leader Bill Frist, R-Tenn., broke a nail and moaned that he had never before been "slapped in the face with such an affront."

Waaa. Waaa. Waaa. Would someone get Frist his pacifier?

Sen. Trent Lott, also had an axe to grind and a cross to burn, uh, I mean bear.
The former Ole Miss cheerleader’s melodramatic response nearly topped Frist’s hissy-fit histrionics

"I’m astounded by this," sniffed Lott. "I don’t really know what the tenor of this is, or what is the justification for it, and why this extreme, you know, approach was used."

At least Lott isn’t the only conservative getting bitch slapped. Failed Supreme Court nominee Robert Bork described President George W. Bush’s selection of Harriet Miers for the high court as a "kind of a slap in the face to the conservatives." We used to be able to tell who the conservatives were by the bad suits. Now, we can identify them because they have red welts on their faces.

After the right wing forced Bush to dump Harriet Miers because she hadn’t bombed an abortion clinic or protested a gay man’s funeral, (or whatever it was they wanted her to do to prove she was a true conservative) they threatened to pick up their marbles and skip home if Bush didn’t choose a nominee who passed their litmus test.

"If we don’t get a good nominee - if it’s somebody else who is a stealth candidate, and we don’t know what their judicial philosophy is - well then that will be the end of the Bush coalition," hissed the Free Congress Foundation’s Paul Weyrich."

Waaa. Waaa. Waaa. If Bush had picked a moderate would Weyrich have threatened to hold his breath until he turned blue?

The wimp factor is not just in word, but also in the dirty deeds of Republicans. The whole nation suspects that Scooter Libby is taking the fall for Dick Cheney. The VP was likely behind the outing of CIA operative Valerie Plame, but would rather see his deputy in the hoosegow than come clean. That’s the definition of a girlie-man.

In the Plame affair, conservative columnist Robert Novak wasn’t exactly macho when he was the first to rat on his source, selling out a fellow Republican faster than special prosecutor Patrick Fitzgerald could say San Quentin. He still won’t discuss his role in the affair or his perfidious snitching.

The transformation of the right wing from Tarzan to timid is the fault of Bush and his namby pamby "compassionate conservatism." This creed allowed conservatives to show their feelings, and once the floodgates opened, the river of tears never stopped flowing.

I make a simple plea to conservatives: Please leave the bleeding heart routine to us liberals. We are not only better at it, but we are actually compassionate. Stealing our act is nothing short of a slap in the face.

http://www.waynebesen.com/2005/11/leave-whining-to-us.html